A good portion of twenty-first century communication is stating
the seemingly obvious. Banner headlines
such as: ‘SMOKING IS BAD FOR YOU’ or ‘BEING POOR MAY NOT ALWAYS BE A POOR
PERSON’S FAULT’ or my favourite: ‘EATING A BACON SANDWICH FOR BREAKFAST MIGHT
BE OKAY, BUT CONSUMING TWENTY-FIVE A DAY FRIED IN LARD AND WASHED DOWN WITH A
GALLON OF FIZZY POP MAY NOT DO YOU MUCH GOOD!’
That kind of thing.
Why is this?
Well – part of the reason for all this no-shit-Sherlockery is the growth
in electronic media. Miles of websites
requires something to put into them, thus pronouncements of this kind become
the visual equivalent of filling in awkward conversational silence - gotta say
something! Also, most news isn’t news at
all; it is the fluff from the dandelion clock-heads of public relations – the
weeds of modernity. But there is
actually a much more fundamental reason for all this, that despite reasons for
and the consequences of our actions being absolutely obvious, we still engage
in stupid, harmful and downright nasty acts.
Violence, substance abuse, paying people a pittance and expecting them
to be able to care for themselves, is rife. Even I have a thrilling anecdote regarding my own bacon-related
dance with death.* NO ONE IS IMMUNE!
Not all of this obvious-ness is related to harm. There are
plenty of completely banal cause-and-effect statements. We seem to
do this to remind ourselves that the most basic tenets of human life
are still there, still true. It is a
self-asserting mantra, a navel-gazing discourse and we love doing it: ‘Have I
really experienced this?’ ‘Yes!’ comes the
resounding answer.
This brings me to this blog of mine. I feel
at odds with its premise. My online
space is supposed to chart my progress from mild-mannered accountant to
Historian of Steel. This implies I should record what I am doing as I do it.
The trouble is that seems too obvious.
Take for instance recent events.
The 28th of June arrived and on the stroke of 11:30, I was an
accountant no longer. I put on a cape
and flew out the door – to Wales ,
actually – and thus began my new life. I
did all sorts, such as walking round harbours and taking rides on narrow-gauge
steam trains. Since then, I have planned my dissertation - an immensely satisfying and rewarding
experience. But did I come here to document this? No.
It seems that once the moment has come and been enjoyed it then
disappears. To go over it again is pointless. The immediacy vanishes and I am now onto the next thing. I
would like to use this blog to document my journey, to write about ideas and compose
essays on subjects that inspire happiness or (mostly) righteous anger. These will serve to show the roads
travelled. But perhaps in ignoring the
more obvious - the ‘I have done this and said that’ - there will be no cause to celebrate. The sense of what is as
compared to what was is lost forever and that seems a shame.
So – I have come here to have my own no-shit-Sherlock
moment. Here is a list of obvious things learnt about life and my good self since leaving work on 28th
June.
- I love studying. When I read a book, the concepts excite me so much that I have leave my desk and walk round my Batcave in circles, rejoicing in the things I have found.
- When motivated, I work really hard and really long. My days in the library last from ten till six with two twenty minute breaks. On my return home, sometimes I reward myself with the night off but mostly I start work again because I want to. Hence my awful inertia in the office was simply caused by a lack of motivation, not because I am inherently lazy and good-for-nothing.
- I like writing. I haven’t started the proper book yet, but am up to chapter five of a story about Batman. The first four chapters were a mess, but on the fifth I hit my stride. I am improving.
- I have boundless energy. I realise now that my headaches and tiredness was (again) linked to doing a job I did not like.
- I am capable of primary source research. This was something of a concern before I started, that perhaps I would get to an archive and become utterly lost. But no - I planned it well and have already amassed enough material to make a dissertation – just not a very good one. There is much work to do.
- I am critical of everything. I am not a person who looks at the world thinks, ‘Isn’t that marvellous?’ Last week, when this was pointed out to me I felt temporarily bad about it – like I should make a self-conscious effort to be cheerier and view the world with a more forgiving searchlight. And then I thought, ‘No, fuck it. Why should I?’ Frankly, this world is awful and needs calling out. My lot in life is not to put up with things and make do and be polite. I have been made to shake people out of their apathy, to point out their bourgeois super-dickery and shame them for it. Not that I’m perfect, but you wouldn’t know I think that if you listened to me. I shall save my forgiveness for my writing where the worlds I make reflect the fact that everyone multi-faceted. Otherwise I shall continue to be bloody objectionable and judgemental. It is the mask I wear.
And finally:
- I am simply living this life and it feels right. I made the correct decision. There is nothing I can add to that.
*I don’t actually have a story about this, but I wish
I did.
